Bainbridge Conversations

From HEART:"I've come in to buy a pair of underpants. I think the ones I have show through my dress." Three ladies surround her for a look-see. They walk carefully, cautiously around her as if she is a precious Chinese vase. "I don't see a thing," says one of the ladies. "Are they striped?" says another. "I think I see - - no, that's a shadow, it's not - - what color are they?" "Black," says the young woman. "Black lace, to be exact." "Turn around one more time," says the tall lady. "Walk over there by the window. Now stop and stay." Finally, the ladies all agree the panties can not be seen.


From PAPER PRODUCTS:
"I am slowly developing a relationship with the color copy machine. It still doesn't like me but I send it good vibes and I say little prayers."
Me: "You say little prayers?"
Employee Girl: "Yes, I pray to it as if it were a kind of God. Like, 'Please, please, dear Copy Machine, don't embarrass me in front of Kay.' I pray like that underneath my breath as I approach the thing."
Me: "Oh, don't bother with prayers involving me, I'm easily satisfied."
Employee Girl: "I know you are, but everyone isn't, and if I need to practice praying, I'd rather practice with you in mind."
Me: "Okay, I'll pray, too. Surely it can't flub up on both of us if we are sending out so many prayers."


From BANK OF AMERICA: "So, you and your husband have been members forever."
Me: "Yes."
"Does he have an account elsewhere now?"
Me: "No."
"Just doesn't use checks anymore, huh?"
Me: "That's about it."


FROM EAGLE HARBOR BOOKS:
"You must be a fast reader!"
"I am, but I'm not a thorough reader. If I love a book I need to read it four or five times."
"Really?"
"Yup. I've read WAR AND PEACE six times."
"Wow!"
"Well, I've read the PEACE parts six times. I've read the WAR part only once."


Overheard at The Pub:
"So my Dad and I were talking on the phone and he was being really nice, truly unusually nice, you know, and then he said 'I've got to take a piss' and he must have pissed out all his compassion because when he returned to the phone he was the same old mean, sarcastic asshole he's always been."

Aleister at the ICE CREAMERY:
"I want one scoop of chocolate and one scoop of.....no, wait, I want two scoops of raspberry swirl with...aw, gee!....Okay, start again. Sorry. Mama Kay, can I have one scoop or two scoops?"
"One, Aleister."
"Okay, then, I've got to get my mind WORKING here. How do I do that?"

Just a few small conversations like this can make my day. Just people going through the events of their lives. I have a tendency to stand around and just listen. Yesterday I overheard a man at a Poulsbo restaurant say, "Well, I've never done it but I've heard it's as good as the real thing!"

Wonder what THAT was about?